Thread:Enchanteddragons/@comment-32460917-20180311024651



No idea how to start this haha I feel so horrible. I get annoyed, saddened, depressed, by little things that shouldn't bother me. I have my good days, but those are few and far in between. Someone once described it as 'not caring'; I always thought that it was a lack of emotion, but lack of care fits better. I don't post because I want to most of the time. I post because I feel like I have to. That if I don't stop contributing, things will move on without me. I don't even know if I have real depression or not, I just think so. I'm probably not even depressed haha I'm just a lying bvtch My mind tells me what I should care about. I want to care about being a good writer, drawing more, and making new friends. But my chest just starts hurting and no motivation or care comes. I have to force myself to draw, play piano, check the forums, because I want to care. My brain fog from winter break is also still here, albeit much less dense. I can barely understand my own writing for some reason, and I can't notice the irregularities in my art unless someone else points them out. I press submit, hoping that it makes sense to everyone else I was really proud when I came back, you know? I left for over a month because of my mental health. That absence helped a lot, and then I came back thinking I was ok now I am better now. At least I'm not suicidal anymore // ok edgy vent over  