User blog:SpecterTheGreat/A couple of Specter's GGaD scribbles

A small collection of writings by Specter, mostly centered around their characters' lives in the past. Please enjoy SPec's terrible writing xD because they need to practice.

Scene 1
''Author's note: possible warning for extremely negative thinking idk? I wrote this because I wated to write something about Bixbite :D but I guess I got kind of lazy at the end. which is ok since I didn't put any effort into it lol. Oh btw, this is before Bix's re-intro thread on the wikia, so you kinda can know what happened.''

Bixbite squeezed her eyes shut and pressed herself further into the slight dent in the stone wall she was leaning against. She sighed and pulled her knees up to her chest in a protective gesture. Of course, there was nothing to be afraid of in this far-away place. And even if there were something, a goddess like her was sure to be able to fend off any attack easily.

No. What she wished she was protected against was… that being that co-existed in her mind. Bixbite knew. That other person could surface at any moment to torture her even more.

And that was something she hated.

There’s just so much a person can take. Being rejected through most of your life is painful enough, and being annoyed everyday would drive someone crazy. But when that annoying thing is firmly rooted into your head and will do anything to control your body, it’s a different story. It was a must, Bix had determined that this being should be kept away from the realm of living beings. With no body to use, it was reduced to a merely bothersome voice. A voice that was trying to chip away at her sanity.

The goddess didn’t know how much longer she’d be able to stand it. Knowing that at some point, her effort would be in vain and Shatter would appear again. But meanwhile, she’d use her willpower to distance herself from anyone that could be hurt. Even if that brought the most negative of thoughts into her mind. Their shared mind.

I wish that day had been the end of my life. She thought bitterly, a couple diamond tears trickling down her cheeks in a mix of frustration and depression. ''If death had only been the thing to give me eternal rest. Even the underworld is more peaceful than this situation. Then, I wouldn’t have had to deal with this. I wouldn’t have to be afraid of my loved ones getting hurt. Disappearing like right now… they probably hate me even more now. Nobody truly cares about my welfare. It’s for the best that I’m away, anyways.''

“But then, you wouldn’t have had the happinesses of the life you enjoy now. Or well, enjoyed.” Bixbite clenched her teeth after the last word, recognizing the voice that came out of her lips despite not being hers. Her cat pupils thinned.

She sighed. “...back to torturing me…?”

“You’re torturing yourself.” Shatter replied through Bix, the latter being unable to do anything to resist the words. “Look, not sleeping for three days. And you haven’t tasted a bit of food since last week!” At that statement, she felt weak and hungry.

“Gods… don’t need to eat or sleep.” She managed out. It was true. But having been dependent on those habits as a mortal, the want for sleep and food was very strong in her now-immortal body. “So shut up and just leave me be.”

“Right, I’ll let you be. Be sad and depressed.” There was a hint of mockery in the voice.

Bixbite frowned. “You know nothing. Even back then, you didn’t even have a separate identity.”

Shatter smirked internally. “Ohhhh, but how could you have forgotten this? I, wow, I have your memories!”  Dammit… The goddess pressed her fists together, her ‘strong’ attitude fading away. Bixbite recalled that one day in that temple, when she had been sure that her long-endured suffering would finally end. Closing her tear-brimmed eyes, she remembered the pain after piercing through her heart with the sharp obsidian blade. This wasn’t something she normally thought about everyday, but Shatter was forcing the thoughts to the top of her mind. Bix couldn’t push them away, and suffered all day long.

Silence.

Shatter’s voice broke through the eerie stillness in the dark cavern. “What if we compromise?”

“What?” Bixbite’s eyes widened, stopping the flow of tears.

“It’s simple,” The Corrupted Deity said in a sing-song voice. “Everything’s so boring for me right now, why shouldn’t I let you go with your friends? I’m sure you’ll enjoy being again around people, maybe even back in the Gemstone Caverns.”

“...”

“Speechless? I shouldn’t really blame you. After everything I did to you, you don’t trust me, right?”

Bixbite took a deep breath. “No, of course not...”

Another mental smirk from Shatter. “But ah, you’re afraid of me hurting them, right?”

All the goddess did now was nod weakly in reply.

“Say, what would be the fun in that? It’s more entertaining to make careful plans to wreak havoc than just go around murdering people. I have standards.”

“You have… standards…?” Bix mumbled.

“Yeah yeah, I’m not the average evil person!” Shatter replied with a huff. “I wouldn’t kill someone just because they’re close to you unless I had a really good reason to make you suffer.”

“You’re just trying to trick me.” Bixbite retorted, “I do not and will never again trust you.”

“Nah. Look, how will you know my intentions if you don’t try it? Don’t you wonder what everyone else is doing right now?”

It has been said hundreds of times that curiosity killed the cat. Maybe this was also true in Bixbite’s case.

The CD continued talking. “I really doubt they miss you, but you do miss them. We can give it a shot. At least for the moment, you’re strong enough that our control over this body is almost shared.”

Bixbite didn’t know what to say. In fact, she did really want to see her friends again. The only problem was… well, having been away for so long, she didn’t remember more than two or three people. Maybe a couple more.

She breathed in and out. A little thought in her more logical mind told her that it was probably just a trick to get Shatter freed. ”Um… I say, let’s give it a try...”

“I knew you would make the correct choice!” Shatter moved Bixbite’s body to a standing position. However, being weak from lack of food, she dropped to the ground. Bixbite bit her lip slightly as she felt the diamonds from her own crying digging sharply into her palms.

“Don’t be a wimp. In before, if I remember correctly- and I do-, you said that gods don’t need food to survive.”

Lucky me, Bixbite thought. She’s not being as annoying as usual. ”I… am very much looking forward to my return to the Caverns and seeing my friends again.” There was a hint of eagerness in her voice that she tried to suppress. This decision wasn’t logical. What she should be doing was just to stoically stay where she was and keep Shatter away from everyone.

“If they remember you at all.” The voice shot back. “Your friends I mean. Well, have it your way. I’m just bored.” Bix felt Shatter vanishing into the depths of her mind. Still, she knew that she would eventually come out again.

But meanwhile, she’d use whatever time she had left to give herself a breather.

A couple tears fell from her eyes at the memory of her old domain. The memory of her friends. They probably don’t want to be my friends any longer; I doubt they really ever were. But… it made me happy to be around them, even if the feelings weren’t genuine from them.

Bixbite slowly trudged to the exit of her current residence: a cave. She had to shiel her sensitive eyes for a moment from the bright sunset. Her non-beating heart seemed to take a happy jump at the outdoors scene she hadn’t seen in weeks. The goddess stood there, just watching the view. Weak in feelings, as always, happy diamonds dripped from the corner of her eyes.

Just a little longer and she’d be back in her home for a while. She would try to find her friends again and be happy for a bit. Until she wouldn’t be. But meanwhile, it was useless to waste time.

Shatter’s earlier words broke through her thoughts. “If they remember you at all.”